Excuses

Of late, I haven't been blogging so much. Or rather, I haven't been posting as much. I have started writing most nights, but either words or paragraphs in, something pulls me back and I press delete or mark it in my drafts folder, which realistically never comes out again. It's not that anything particular has happened or gone wrong, I've just felt a bit "meh". After my month off work, I felt so much more settled and on top of the world. Since returning to work and accepting redundancy, I have been, to put it politely, all over the place and a bit sorry for myself. Partly, a parade of bugs that are never quite bad enough to keep either of us at home hasn't helped and neither has Wriggles' sudden toddlerdom of tantrum throwing or sleep regression!

When I started this blog, after reading others that either amused or inspired me, it was for me to use both as therapy to get over the bad memories and to make good memories. When it started, Wriggles barely ate and we had spent about four months constantly in and out of hospital between which I would go to work...only to be in hospital with Wriggles the day after or sometimes, hours. However, things were showing signs of improvement and I was hopeful that our journey might be looking more straightforward. Quite quickly, it became apparent this wasn't too be the case. Although things have been up and down since coming out of NICU, I've always been very aware how things could be more complex, more limiting. But a small part of me, the regular mum bit, not just the ex-neonatal-mum, has also been aware how much simpler things could have been.